Hi Everyone,
I am looking for tips and suggestions on how to bond with my beautiful Petunia. We rescued her from the humane society in April, and she still seems to be distant from us. I would love to create a better bond with her. We think from the way she first reacted when we got her, she would run/bolt when we walked by, that there was a possibility she was abused. She acted like she was possibly kicked.

Any suggestions would be awesome.

Thanks

Hello Nire,

and first of all, my heartfelt thanks for giving a poor and abused cat a loving home. This cannot be valued highly enough.
From what I hear from friends here, the magic word is time.....it will take this poor being a long time to forget she was abused and that you will not do this to her, raising hand abruptly or wlaking too close may scare her. Have you tried sitting down on the floor and calling her to you? This way, you put yourself on a lower level and do not act like from above where she may expect to be hit or kicked. When you sit down, rattle with a a box of treats and when she comes near, toss one to her. One way to the heart of the cats is food:)
Also when sitting down, toss a toy near her, a ball or a little mouse, so that she sees you mean no harm.

I am sure the other friends will come up with more suggestions. What is your babies color and how old is she?

My best wishes to you and her, I am sure she will come around with time.

Birgit

Birgit's tips are great, especially the sitting on the floor and the treat parts.

The only other thing I can offer is Bach Flower Essences. Regardless of her history, a rescue cat almost always comes with emotional baggage. BFE's are a bit on the voodoo-side, but they work on an emotional level. I've used them with great successes at times. And the one nice thing is that if you pick the wrong remedy, there's no side effects.

Good luck and thanks for adopting a rescue!

Sometimes no matter what you do, they're still skittish.

We are pretty sure that our little grey tabby had been abused. It took a long time for her to not bolt when anyone made a movement. We were careful not to make sudden motions or talk loudly around her. It is a GREAT idea to sit on the floor near your kitty. I would sit on the floor with a toy or put an open box on the floor next to me. (Kitties love boxes.) She gradually went from exploring to being a lap cat. She's 8 now and the biggest problem we have with her is getting her out of our lap.

Good luck with your sweetheart Petunia. And bless you for rescuing her.

While I have no experience with a skittish rescue cat -- my two are rescues, but are amazingly sociable fellows, I do recommend getting down on the floor with the cat, on all fours even! My boys get especially social and cuddly when I am looking them in the eye at their level. I am become a cat magnet! We are giants to them, after all, and maybe it is reassuring to them when we show some deference to them by encountering them in their space.

Gordon was not a rescue but he was a wild kitten...spent his first 6 weeks living outside...so him and his sister and brother were super scared and upset by being around me at first. With Gordon the key was sitting on the floor and feeding him from a spoon...when he ate from the spoon he learned I must not be all that bad and he started to like me. I am sure its much different with a grown cat that has been abused, and I agree with others that may just take time...but with cats it does seem like food is a good way into their hearts,

Thank you for all your advice.
I never thought to get down to her level more often. For sure I will try that.
She has come along way in the time we have had her, she no longers runs from us when we walk by, but time is obviously still needed for her to bond more closely with us.

Here are some photos:
The day she came home from the Humane society. She was very underweight, and since she had been on the streets for awhile, she also needed the lion cut because she was so badly matted.



And this is what she looks like today:


I also have since gotten a persian kitten as well. Not a rescue.
Petunia and Willow

Oh wow she is gorgeous!!!!!! She was on the streets...poor thing she is so beautiful! I love blue and white persians, I have 2 myself...I love your new kitten also...I would love to have a little tabby persian boy to add to my group, but my husband thinks we have enough cats at 3....what does he know!? HAHA. Well yeah it looks like your kitty is coming along well...and you know some cats are just not super affectionate. My Muffins has never been very affectionate...she may spend the entire day upstairs in the bedroom only coming down to drink water and eat and ignore me while the other 2 follow me everywhere I go...but then every so often she will come and lay on my lap and those are the special moments I know she is my Independent girl but she loves me.

Thank you for adopting her. Your kitties are beautiful!